Here's my take on the Tiger Woods crash - which is coming from the perspective of a firefighter having responded to more crashes than I can count AND from what I (and 99% of America) am reading and hearing via the media.
Tiger Woods leaves his house at 2:25 AM (probably to go stand in line at Target for the Black Friday sales). He hits a fire hydrant and tree at a speed too slow to deploy the airbags. His wife, who is inside the house, hears the crash, grabs a golf club (they are probably laying around the house like dog hair in mine), rushes out, breaks the back window of the car with the golf club, climbs from the back of the Escalade over the back seat to the front seat and pulls her husband out of his front seat back over the back seat and out the back window to safety (probably because all four doors of his Escalade had been crushed and jammed from the impact - which didn't deploy the air bags - and could not be opened requiring extrication through the back window). She then drags him to the street (he is incoherent from the impact) where she begins to render first aid.
Amazing story of heroism.
THAT'S funny from my disjointed sense of humor. And something tells me this is NOT what really happened.
Oh wait... this just in...
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